After finishing dinner at El Torito last night, my car was pulled over at a sobriety checkpoint, and I was forced to breath into a microphone which measured my blood/alcohol level. Since the last time I drank alcohol was when my mother gave me Nyquil cough syrup in 1974, I didn't register high enough for booking and was allowed to continue on (though I was ready to try a Jedi mind trick had it become necessary to escape.)
Driving on my way, I realized something about train commuting in Tokyo. Commuters are constantly reminded by station masters to be polite. Announcements continually stream over loudspeakers, on the platform and inside the train, with the fervor of an Arab call to prayer: don't eat on the train, don't sit impolitely, don't dive into a train as the doors are closing, don't pinch other passengers' posteriors, don't use a cell phone around other passengers.
Bad breath is forgiven, yet it bothers other passengers far more than a quiet cell phone conversation. I am starting a movement to change the rules. Beginning March 1, the station master should enforce mandatory breathalizer tests, randomly administered. Anyone who hasn't brushed their teeth for a over a week would not be allowed to board the train.
I remember helping Nat at work when I was 14. There was a co-worker there that must have had halitosis. Nat and I were there working late one night and we rearranged the desks near her so that this bad-breath chic was facing the wall, away from everyone nearby. It was kind of mean, but completely neccesary.
Do the loudspeakers help keep everyone nice?
Posted by: Emily House | February 05, 2007 at 09:32 AM
People pretend to ignore it, but are really embarssed if confronted about it.
Posted by: Tashi | February 05, 2007 at 05:18 PM
I think that people who have not brushed their teeth should not be allowed to go see the Doctor either. When they open their mouth and say "aaahhh" some people can basically tell a whole room what they havn't been doing for a few days.
Posted by: Jordan | March 02, 2007 at 01:11 AM
Brock, Your blog posts are very funny. You should be a writer. You're making me laugh out loud with your stuff.
I think I'd like to try Your commute, just once, because I think it would be both hilarious and infuriating. I actually ride the bus and/or train every day back and forth to downtown SLC. So many funny & annoying things happen to you when you commute. After six months of it, I have to say that the prospect of doing this
for another 23 years makes me want to cry.
Posted by: Rick | March 07, 2007 at 10:45 AM